I learned a beautiful lesson today about owning my emotions. It came to me (finally) just in time to stop me from hurling my love at another person in the hope that they would catch it and throw it back to me, and not let it hit the ground and smash into a million pieces. I stopped the launch moments before the countdown reached zero, and recognised the joy of simply holding that love inside myself, where it already was, where I hoped it would return every time I threw it out, threw it at another person, shouting: “Catch!” And if they did: “Now throw it back to me, but dress it up as You.”
It is something my Tantra Teacher had suggested I do quite a while ago; but it took this long for that good idea to percolate fully in my consciousness before arising spontaneously as this exquisite experience. I held that love. I allowed it to simply be, and I recognised it as my own, or, more accurately, as my own connection to the limitless love we all have access to, the love that holds us all in its fertile embrace. I didn’t need reciprocation. I didn’t need to put my happiness in the hands of another (which is a trick you play on yourself anyway). Love was in me and it overflowed. There was enough to share and I was happy and secure in my sharing.
I highly recommend it, and I am writing this down as much to remind myself to “Keep doing that!” as to share the lesson with you and anyone you’d like to share it with. Love doesn’t need to be traded, but it can definitely be shared when your own container overflows.
And the same lesson can be applied to other emotions like sadness, anger, fear, etc. Abort the launch and allow them to simply be. Recognise the connection you are making and then decide if you’d like to increase or decrease that connection (by chosing what to focus on).
There are so many layers to our being and experience, and I have written from the point of view of more than one of them in order to help you to journey with me. I hope it helps. Feel free to share your own experiences with this kind of thing in the comments section below.
Lots of Love, Patrick.